There's quite a few things in life that I really can't wrap my mind around. Theoretical physics, higher level math, and racism/sexism/homophobia.

A few years ago, back when I worked the night shift in a different department, there was this coworker that I would take my smoke break with. One day, there was an accident at the corner, and people standing around, looking at the car. As we were walking up to take a closer look, and we're chatting about the accident, she says, "Oh you know those people".

"Um, I hate to point this out to you," I replied, "but white people get into car accidents too."

"That's not what I meant!"

Seriously? What the fuck else could you have possibly meant? There's a group of black people looking at, presumably, their seriously mangled car. My bet is that would it be considered totaled by the insurance company. And how did that car get so mangled? There was a city bus parked halfway up the hill. My first thought on seeing that was that yet another city bus plowed into a car. (That was about the third accident I've seen at that corner involving the city bus and mangled cars.) The only other possible option for what "those people" (and it was said in that tone!) mean would be "bus drivers". And we hadn't seen the bus yet.

I'm not surprised by a country club pool that refuses entry to black kids. I find it very sad and extremely stupid, but I know that those white people are out there. I mean, you have to be a joy-killing heartless bastard to tell a bunch of kids, "I'm sorry, you can't have fun here because the chlorine might dissolve your blackity blackness into our pristine, pure white water. We wouldn't want to poison our children into thinking it's acceptable or fun to play with the darkies."

It's not always so blatant, but I always feel like mocking it, it's such a pervasive part of white life. "Don't go to that neighborhood!" even if it's a quiet neighborhood, where there isn't a lot of crime, just the presence of black people. It's nuts.

When I point this out to other white people, they get a little edgy. I love the phrase "Let me tell you about [insert ethnic/cultural group here]", because I know what's coming out next...the most bigoted things that you could imagine. Like if I just opened my eyes to see, and basked in the expertness of this white person (usually male) living in the ghetto, or in a gay area, or near "Mexicans" (because Puerto Rico is part of Mexico or something!), I'd just know that they are awful people who need to be separated from us! It never once occurs to these people to leave their neighbors alone and stop spying on them, to stop being so fucking nosy and just mind their own goddamn business. The best one, I think, is the guy whose anger toward his black neighbors boiled down to the fact that they never said "Hello" back to him.

It's not that I'm perfect either. No white person is. But at the very least, people can leave well enough alone. Seriously. Just because a person doesn't like Hispanic people or gay people doesn't mean that we have to build walls or arrest them or prevent them from getting jobs. Just keep your nasty thoughts to yourself and your opinions (which is what it really is) away from our laws. If the sight of a black person driving a BMW chaps your ass, so be it, but that's your problem, not the rest of the country's problem. It would also be nice to not assume that because we share the same skin color, I will think as you do...because really, I don't care. I'm not interested in hearing about how Jews are running the planet, how Richard Gere is so gay he's stuffing gerbils up his ass, or how the great black hordes are going to rape all white women. I mean, if you have to let your limited imagination run wild with outdated conspiracies and urban legends, that's fine, but I can think of far better things that are way more amusing.

Although if I read another article on how women don't like sex or that rape is the woman's fault, I'm gonna punch something. I may not be Slutty McSlut slut, but even if I was, it doesn't matter. The nose can stay out of my business!