Wow!

This is kinda surrealistic.

I was in a very, very large church. It was built in a semicircle, and there were endless rows of chairs, much like a movie theater. The carpeting in the church was red. The most striking thing about it, next to the caniverousness of the place, was the where the altar and pulpit where: on the red carpet, the bright white of these objects stood out starkly, and the black accents stood out nicely. The wall was a bright white, and you couldn't help but look at it. The rest of the church walls were darkly colored, although as I took my seat, I took no notice of them; instead, I was transfixed by the whiteness of the wall, and the chair for the preacher, and the pulpit.

The chairs were plush and very comfortable. One could almost fall asleep in them. Once everyone was seated -- and really, it took awhile for that, with all the visiting people tend to do when they enter church -- the service began. The presider walked in, wearing a vestment of white and black, and began to preach.

And then wall lit up. Which would have been a really neat Jesus effect, like a sermon with a Powerpoint presentation, ("You are going to hell in these ways..."), if the screen wasn't showing commercials. Coke, I remember, was advertised, among other things. Oh, and there was trivia, which the congregation could participate in, using a little hand-held number pad that pulled out of the armrest.

Needless to say, I was stunned.

I looked around, finally noticing the people. They were nodding rhythmically to the preacher's voice, while trying to beat their neighbor at the trivia questions. And then I started to listen to what he was saying. Horrible things. Unchristian things. I had to get up out of my seat. I made my way to an aisle, and then started walking down it, staring at the preacher with horrific fascination at this whole ungodly spectacle. Suddenly, he picked on a parishoner, saying their name, and telling that person exactly why they are going to hell. I couldn't take it any longer. I started yelling at him at the top of my lungs, about how horrible he was and that he was misusing the words of Jesus and the Bible. At first, he didn't hear, but as I got closer, he noticed me. I was yelling and yelling, trying to get someone in the congregation to hear me, but no one did, they were all too busy with the trivia, and TV, and the preacher. Even as I stood next to someone sitting in an aisle seat, they paid me no mind. And then the preacher did a funny little hand signal, and suddenly there were several men coming up and down the down the aisle at me...

And then I woke up.

To this day, I have no idea what posessed me to dream that. It felt so real and I was so relieved that it had just been a dream.

WiFi in the church? What's next? Powerpoint? Coke commercials?